01 You Would Give Me Kiss If I Were On Soccer Team
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team!
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
Yes, You would give me kiss if I were on the soccer team,
I know this because you are girlfriend of Rasheem
If I had a jersey with a number on the back,
Then you would be my girlfraind and you would give me smack
When I’d did a telephone call you’d call me back,
You would take me for a ride in your Cadillac
You would give me milk, to go with my Apple Jack,
but you dont, this hurt Hashmeer like a thumb tack
I play chess, but you dont care,
still like soccer player with his very long hair
And I ask for half of candy-cane you would not share,
This made me mad like a big grizzly bear!
Every time I try out for team I get chopped,
Coach says to me, “Hashmeer you need to stop”
No I do not care, and I keep on trying cause I think
you would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
I like to paint, and I like to draw
but I don’t get play cause i do not kick the soccer ball
You don’t even say Hi when you see me in the hall
Try to give you kaiss but you push me and I fall
If I wore the Umbrex and a pair of cleats,
you would want to do a sex on the bed sheets,
Then we would go out and get a bite to eet
We would have a sandewich with lettuice and meat
Then we go back home and watch Jerry Letterman
I know you like Rasheem but Hashmeer’s the better man
He might be good at soccer but I think he’s too mean…
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
Soccer, Soccer, Soccer, Soccer….
You would give me kiss if I were on soccer team
Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
For two weeks, practiced night and day
but I’m still not good enough for the Coach to let me play
Guess what I discovered while I’m at the Jiffy Lube??
Hashmeer is very good at Rubix Cube!
I can separate white and red from the green,
I will chop opponients like a guilliotine and yais
I am better at the Rubix Cube than James Deen,
and I am better at the Rubix Cube than Charlie Sheen
If my pants be dirty I wash them then they’re clean
Could have been my queen,
I could have been your Keeng,
but now all women want to date this mean machine,
I dont need you besh, I’m on the Rubix Cube team!!!
Rubix, Rubix, Rubix, Rubix!……
I dont need you besh and I dont need your soccer team
cause now bish I’m on the Rubix Cube team
Rubix, Rubix, Rubix, Rubix!…..
I dont need you besh and i don’t need your soccer team
Know what I mean? Know what I mean?
02 Peanuts (Toot Toot)
Hey, tell me who’s hot, who’s not?!
tell me who you wanted to go to the store…
[uh huh, yeah] <——- backup assistance vokals iz Haht Pauwkett aka White Chocolate of White Chocolate, mislabled Natural Disaster on 40 oz. Slushie CD
him or me?
[yeah uh huh, yeah]
if he goes he buys broccoli
but i buy candy but no
i don’t want no twizzlex bar
[twizzlex bar]
i don’t want no hershey crunch
i don’t want no candy cane
[cane cane…]
cause i need a good snack to go with my lunch
so i Step to the snack machine [yeah]
and i Take out my dollar bill [dollar bill y’all, y’all]
but the snack machine said correct change
i get mad, put back my dollar bill!
this is bad, now i’m sad
no peanut make hash(m)eer mad!!!…. soree i mispronownce my own naim
so i did phone call to chiropractor doug hewitt [hewitt}
ask him to bring change
said he would do it [do it]
but he forgot
now i’m mad at him
but i still go in for free back estimate
i drink gote’s milk and sometimes punch [sometimes punch]
and i need a good snack to go with my lunch
I want:
Peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
what i want, what i want
I eat peanuts every day
feels so good when i have them in my hain [hain]
i do not care what the people say [say]
cause if i don’t got my peanuts then i’m in pain [Uptown y’all]
they got vitamins and minerals
make me strong yes, you can tell [blade yeah]
they make me a lyrical general [Hashmeer]
you don’t eat peanuts go to the hell [got Rex in effects]
you can do 200 push up
if you eat peanuts a lot
then you get the girls with the really good butt [excellent time]
and they let you put your peepuette in tha crapshot
peanuts good, potato chip bad
peanuts are the best snack i ever had
they have such a good smelly scent
but you better look out for the elephant
cause he took my peanuts while i was on the poo-pot
then he looked me in the face, said he did not [nah, he did]
i say “you took my peanuts, youre gonna get a punch” [Shit yo]
cause i need a good snack to go with my lunch
i want:
Peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
peanuts (Toot Toot)
what i want, what i want
what i want, what i want [Break it down Rex]
{whisper}
peanuts (toot toot)
peanuts (toot toot)
what i want, what i want [yeah]
peanuts (toot toot)
peanuts (toot toot)
peanuts (toot toot)
what i want, what i want
peanuts (toot toot)
Peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you got a shirt unbutton the collar
peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you did a shirt unbutton the collar
peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you got a shirt unbutton the collar
peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you got a shirt unbutton the collar
peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you did a shirt unbutton the collar
peanuts peanuts two for a dollar
if you got a shirt unbutton the collar
03 Rollerskate Date
Like the way you sing
like the way you daince
hashmeer like the way you look in the hot paints, huh
look so good i want to give you a hug
make want to do the sex on grizzly bair rug
like the way you walk when you jiggul your hips
look so good make me want to do a flip and
bet you taste a better than a hot dog and chep
wish i could at least give you kick on the leps
i see you everyday in mercedex benz
i see you everyday riding with your friends
i say cmon girl cmon give me a ride
but you don’t even see me you don’t let me inside
i not good at the soccer ball
and i smell pretty badth
and i’m not very tall
but gimme a call, let’s go out scwhy wait?!
but you have to pay and we go rollerskaite
Rollerskating
on a friday evening, Schwat?
besh i’m not stayin
if you are not payin
I say to “hey” you say “what you want”
i say i saw you other day in the restraunt
you had a dinner, then a piece of pie
but why were you sitting with a idiot guy
so i go to you and i say “who is him”
you say “go away hashameer, that’s my boyfriend”
i said i down’t care if he is your boyfriend
cause i want to towch your poocaithe
with my slimjim
then boyfraind got up
hit me in the head
push me on the floor
kick me in the laig
hurt so bad and it hurt so lot
but i know he got mad cause you think i’m hhot
yes you like me i can tell
even though you say go away and go the the hell
so girl why wait let’s go on a date
but you have to pay and we go to rollerskate
Rollerskating
on a friday evening, Schiggity-Schwat
besh i’m not staying
if you are not paying
x3
Push off besh
04 Jonny Poopoopants
Jonny, Jonny, Jonny Jonny Jonny Jonny
Poopoopants… poopaints
Poopaints, poopoopaints
Poopoopants… poopants
Poopants… Poopoopaints
Poopants, poopants
Poopoopants, poopoopants
Jonny, (Jonex) Jonny, Jonny Jonny Jonny Jonny
Poopoopants… poopants
Poopants, poopoopants etc etc
Poopants… poopoopants
Jonny, Jonny, Jonny Jonny Jonny Jonny
Poopoopaint(s)….
(Why did I want to be like Johnny poopoopants?)
Because he has a good bowtth, and it’s good at daince
(And why all the ladies want to do the touch with him?)
Because he has a too hundered foot slimjim i saidth
(Uh what?)
Jonny, Jonny, Jonny Jonny Jonny Jonny
Poopoopants… poopaints
Poopants, poopoopaints
Poopaints… poopants etc etc
Shiggity-What?
Poopoopants… poopoopants
Jonny pants, poopants
Poopoo, poopoo, poopoopaints
Jonny, Jonny, Jiggity Jiggity Jiggidy Jonny
Poopoopants… poopaints
Poopants, poopoopaints!
Say What?!
Poopants… poopants
Poopoo, poopoo, poopoopants
Jonny pants, poopants
Poogadoo-Paints
Poopoo, poopoopants
Jonny, Jonny, Jiggity Jiggity Jiggidy Jonny
Poopoopaints
Oh, shaith
The god-thame remix
Toot-toot betch
Listen
Poopoo in the paints
And poopoo in the pants
(Say what?)
Poopoo in the pants
Piggidy poopoo in the pants
(Shiggidy what?)
Jonny likes to sing and daince
Jonny likes to poopoo pants
Jonny likes to sing and daince
Jonny likes to poopoo paints
Poopoo in the pants
And poopoo in the paint
(Say what?)
Poopoo in the paints
And poopoo in the pants
Jonny likes to go to Fraince
Jonny likes to eat some/the ants
Johnny likes to go to France
Jonny likes to poopoopants
05 Oh Good God!
Phonecawl of Blaid to Chevron gais station
06 Don’t Touch That
Don’t touch thait!
Don’t touch thait!
Cain’t haiv it
Hains off!
Shmy Shmy Shmy Shmy
Music did me so goodth, made me say Oh My Gowdth
Thank u for giving me a two hip rhyme
and a two hop feet
It feel goodth and I don’t know vat but that’s my hot dowg
and you can’t touch so get your hainds off! and you know wat?
That’s my hot dowg… Cain’t Towch!
Cain’t Touch Thaith
Hains off!
Get Away, Besh…
Every time you see me, Hashmeer is in trouble
I like to chew gum, and i like to blow a bubble
One time I blew a bubbul so big
Inside of the bubble, was a littul kedth
Little kedth come out and he says to me “Schwawth?”
I said get ur hainds off my hut dowg that is something: Cain’t Towch
DON’T TOUCH THAT!
Caint Hev It!
Hains Off!
Put It Down!!
OHHH OHH OH OH OH
GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO! GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO!
OHHH OHH OH OH OH
GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO! GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO!
STOP!
HASHMEER-TIME!
When I get tir-ed, I like to taik a naip… And you say Group X steel the beats, and that’s bownch owf craip!
Why would we ever stopp doing thait?
‘Cuz Puff Daiddy dew it except he cannot rapp
Been around tha whurld frum Chicago to Yew Nork
It’s Hashmeer Go Hashmeer Go Hashmeer Go Hashmeer aind the rest can go away!
SHWATT?! (Schwawth?)
DON’T TOUCH THAT!
Caint Hev It!
Eye bowmb yur howse, idioth
GO TO TOWN!!!!
OHHH OHH OH OH OH
GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO! GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO!
OHHH OHH OH OH OH
GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO! GO HASHMEER GO HASHMEER GO!
STOP!
Idiot
07 White Chocolate & Group X
White Chocolate, Group X
(Hawt Pawkett aka White Chocolate speek ain Natural Disaster whisper ain Yail)
Well if you put your face in my face
then I kick a rock in it
That’s why Group X be kickin’ it
With group White Chocolate
And evhreybody who wants to hev a brokin neck
Come on besh step up, step to Group X
Everybody wundering what’s next
It’s uh, White Chocolate and…
(White Chocolate rapp / Natural Disaster screem)
Group X!
White Chocolate comes first straight
No-rehearse
Freestylin on tha mic
Kick tha free verse
Group X is next
And the best put em to the test
That’s why it’s White Chocolate
And Group X!
Uh Oh, i told you
Well Eef we had a job,
We would be the boss
And we’d dip opponients
In the hawt-sauce
Everybody who tries to step to Group X
Thain yais we tear you up
Like like tha bad paychex
Little kaidths don’t cry
Don’t get depressed
Here come White Chocolate
And Group X!
(White Chocolate Rhyme)
So here I’m gonna let it go
Kickin it with the flow
Workin’ at Walmart brings me all the dough
Partyin’ on tha mic
But I just might
And let the lyric i write that is tight
You can’t step to the best
Don’t try to test the dope sound of
White Chocolate /Group X, yeah
’cause we’re the
best flowin masters on the mic
And yeah we’re gonna let it sound tight
Like this beat right here:
(Hashmeer beety-bowx rhyme)
When tha weemin see us they all geht excited
So dont try to taik this ’cause we got it copee-rited
And if you try to rown weef us in a race then
We’re bowt to put it baick in yur face wit
Group X! White Chocolate & Group X! Yeah!
08 Strawberry Short Song
Strawberry
Schiggidy-Strawberry
Strawbe…. Oh Shaith
09 Too Many Guys
Prostitute… i hate you
Put down the oreo crackers and qwuit doing the saix
This is for you…
Hey, girl if it weren’t for you, everyday after school i got nothing to do
I went to your house like evheryday,
You are stupid besh cause you gave me some play
But i didnt like it, wansn’t very goodth
now you are prostituthe of neighborhoodth, and chocolate caike and chocolate pie, that is how you get very big thighs!!!
And i do not like your very big thighs, besides
you have been with too many guys.
And i do not like your cottage cheese thighz,
besides you have been with too many guys
Stop it stop it stop it!
you did sex, you need to stop, every guy is not lollypop
If you turned to dinosaur when you did the sex, every day you would be the tyranysource rex
If when you did the sex i got a nickel, i would have enough to buy a new tricicle
Then i could buy a braind new pair of tennais shoes, but look out besh, you might get/caitsh HIQ
Now you are prostitue who tells lie, got no friends so you sit thare and cry
Chubby chin, chubby cheek, chubby thigh
You have been with Too Many Guys!
i do not like your cottage cheese thigh,
besides you have been with too many guys
and i do not liek yur poo-poo thigh
besides Besh you hev been with Too Many Guys
Stop it stop it stop it!
You eat chocolate cake and chicken… you spend to much time in the kitchen
You touched my hotstick, then i went to dinner
Then you tried to move into the Misses Winner’s
You said give me turkey braist and turkey leg, besh you should enroll wif Julie Craig
You know who you are and it’s not a surpryse, besides besh you have been with too many guys!
And i do not like your cottage cheese thigh, besides you have been with too many guys!
And i do not like your poo poo thighs, besides you have been with too many guys
Stop it stop it stop it!
Stop it stop it, stop it Besh stop it!
Stop it stop it, stop it Besh stop it!
Stop it stop it, stop it Betsh stop it!
Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it
Not 10 guys, not 18 guyz, not two ain a hailf guys, nowt 100 guys , not 800 guys, not toot toot guys, not 30 guys,
Too Many Guys!
10 Dat Cereal Bawx
Phonecawll of Blaid from local Hot Station 100.7 Southeestern Polytechnical Program School to local Krogretthe
11 Schfifty-Five
Hey, leetul girl. Did you want to know… a see-ker-it?
Cause I know one, and it is sooooo good to heer it.
You want to know what it schwas?
Alright, I’ll tell you what schwas.
I know… how to count… alllll de way to schfifty five.
…and I will tell you how to dew it
Faister than you can say, “Poopty Peupty paints”.
You ready to hear it, baby?
Arrrright.
Schwon
Too
Two an haif.
Scheven.
Schfourteen-teen.
Schwenty-one.
Schwenty-seven heif.
Twenty seven, thirty seven, “WHAT YOU SAIDTH?!”
Shiggity schwawth?
Schifty-five.
Shiggity Schwat,
Schfifty-five.
Shiggity shiggity schwath?
Schfifty-five.
Shiggity shcwatadee-schwath?
Schfifty-five
Gurlfriend’s Age: Schfifty-five.
My IQ: Schwifty-five.
You must pay… 5 + 5 is fifty, fifty, fifty!!
Schfifty-five!
Shiggity-schwadatee, schwatee-schwawth?
Schwhatieschwhat?
Schfifty-five,
My IQ is schfifty-five
Shiggity schwadatee, schwatatee-schwawth?
Schwifty-five
Schwatatee schwat schwat schwat?
Schwat?
Schiggity-schwat?
Schfifty-schfifty-five
Come on girl, when you add 5+5,
Come on girl, fifty five, do that fifty five
Come on girl, come on girl, shake your buttuex (What?!)
Fifty five, fifty five, now lets do the saix! C’mon…
Schfifty-five!
etc….
Come on gurl, 55!
What you say?! Schfifty-five
What didth you say?! Schfifty-five
Can not hear you! Schfifty-five
My ear cant do it…
Shiggity, schwattatee, schwatatee, schwawth, schwath, schwawth????
Schfifty-five…
12 Bang Bang Bang
I just want bang bang bang
i dont want relationship
i just want bang bang bang
i dont want to know your name
i just want bang bang bang
i dont want to meet your mom
i just want bang bang bang
besh you drive me insane
will you giv me thait
bang bang bang
ok… annie… leestin
i dont want to maik sex,
eat chocolathes,
look at aneemals,
take wawlk, no…
you come home and ewe say hashmeer touch me down there i like that
i dont think so annie
dont have time, want to drink,
cigarette
you know. you know whut else i nheed annie?
i tell you what
i just want bang bang bang
i dont want to talk to you,
i just want bang bang bang
i dont want to know your name
i just want bang bang bang
i dont want relationshep, i just wawnt bang bang bang
besh you drive me insane
when u giv me thait
Bang Bang Bang!
Oh hashmeer, hashmeer you look so goodth in that haith
why dont you give me lots of kess?
Wrawng (echo) wrawng wrang wrowng…
I dont think so Annie
you want me to do things to you like the sun and tha moon
idioth, i dont hev time,
i hev to many weemen
All i got time for you know whut is?
i just want bang bang bang,
i dont want to talk to you,
i just want bang bang bang,
i dont want to know your name
i just want bang bang bang
besh you drive me insane
when u giv me thet
bang bang bang,
Besh besh besh besh
just geev me thait
bang bang bang
Bang bang bang
Shididiga bang bang
Shwath? bang bang bang
I dont wawnt relashunship, i just want bang bang bang (echo) bang bang bang
13 Mario Twins
hey schbladthe!
shiggity shiggity shwawth
guess what idiot,
what you did today?
uh…
wrong!
hey i got a new super 88 system!
you did not!
swear to Gowdth! i got it at chunky’s for two dollarez
oh yeah, let me see it… wow! that’s pretty goodth
yeah, you like that – idiot! (i do)… i got it, you down’t.
shut up – god daime!
hey guess what? what? it has new game…
what game?!
i want to play it! it is called Mario Twins
they look the same. wow!
Goodth Godth, they look so god daimn like the same person. i would say to them, “you want ice cream cone?” both of them say yes. how in the hell?!
they are twins, that’s why
what the hell. hey lets play it! ready? All righth, do it
there it goes…
(then play gahme Mario Twins)
Aifter beet gaim becawse we are baist:
Hey blaid, blaide!
Uh oh, you fownd the princaiss
Wrong!!!!
She’s in anuther house, go away!
What in the hell she’s doing?!
Hey, craip on this
Let’s go plahy Super Mario’s Punch-Off
All right, let’s quit this game
(Sownd of gaim endhing turn off for consave poweretthe)
14 Good Girl Yes, Bad Girl No
I don’t want her to schbreak my window!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
I don’t want her to break my window
Hey girl, you not very nice
You don’t even know how to tie your own shoe-es
I asked to you, “How to tie a shoe?”
You said “I didn’t know so I wear the velcro” hah
I gave you twainty dollers to go to the store
You came back late and forgot to close the door
Then u ate my apple and u didnt eet tha core
And i said give me a five but you only gaiv me four
Tried to do a phonecall but didn’t put the quartur
Went to Taco Hut but then you forgot to order
Tried to go to Mexeeco but didnt cross the border
And you said that you are taller than me but you are shorter
You one time lost my favorite GI Joe
And you tried to step one time my littul toe
You say you run faist but i know you run slow
Plows I don’t want you to break my window!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Santie Claws says Ho Ho Ho!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
I don’t want her to schbreak my window
You turn the TV loud and you leave on the light
I cook deennir for you but you didnt taik a bite
You thought that you supposed to eat that breakfist at nighth
And you took my caindy steck gurl, that’s not right
You flushed the poo-pot while I was under the shower
Said you take a minuette, but you taik oon hour
Forgot to give the water, then you kill my flower
And you said that you are sweet but i know thet you are sowr
So Hashmeer is feenished with tha Bad Girl
The ones with good butth and the twirly-twirl
I dont care if your hair has the curly-curl
Cause youre not good like a caindy swirl
So you can keep my chocolates and my yo-yo
Cause Im thru with you aind it’s thyme for me to go
Cause i neehd a good girl and bad gurls you should know
I won’t allow you again to schbreak my window!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
I don’t want her to break my window
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
I don’t want her to play with my yo-yo
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
I don’t want you to step my big toe
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
Good girl yes, bad girl no!
We’re not in Kansis enymore To-To